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Astrology for Lovers

by Liz Greene
I am a  and
She / He is a  and

Aries with Gemini

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You are an Aries

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The Gemini partner

Geminis sometimes have a hard time knowing what they feel, and an even harder time talking about it. The Gemini partner is usually knowledgeable, sparkling and witty about any subject under the Sun except his own emotions. A Gemini in love can be poetic and eloquent, and no sign writes better love letters. In fact, for a Gemini, letters, e-mails, faxes, long-distance phone conversations and SMS messages are often preferable to direct face-to-face confrontation when it comes to talking about the really personal stuff.

Probe a Gemini about more complex feelings, and you'll get silence at best and untruths at worst. It's not that he's deliberately lying to you. It's that he usually just doesn't know why he just said what he did, or acted as he did. Lots of Geminis are terrified of emotional complexities and emotional depths. Yet Gemini needs a companion who can swim in the waters he fears so much. He longs for a safe and emotionally secure relationship so that he can feel a little less fragmented and a little better grounded in life. The trick is to be able to provide that intuitive understanding and acceptance without becoming emotionally invasive.

Possessiveness is definitely not on, so if you're into jealous scenes and accusations, choose another sign. When Geminis feel trapped and unhappy, they'll usually keep quiet and let you do all the blaming if the relationship ends badly. The Gemini partner isn't usually either spiteful or vindictive. But one too many failed relationships with a possessive, mistrustful partner can erode a Gemini's confidence in his own reliability, which is never that great to begin with.

All too often, Gemini is drawn to someone who offers parenting rather than real communication and understanding. It's their own fault, of course, because they think that's what they want - especially if they've been having a hard time lately.

Because this is essentially a refined, cerebral sign, many Geminis secretly feel horribly vulnerable in the face of life's tougher, uglier challenges, and they seek the safety of a devoted, stable mate. That's fine, and you may need to provide lots of common sense and patience to help your Gemini partner focus his considerable talents and produce something solid and lasting. But offering stability isn't the same as playing mother.

The Gemini partner may be childlike at times, but he hates being patronised or controlled. Lots of Geminis learn early, the hard way, that all the security in the world can't compensate for the loss of mental and emotional freedom. The Gemini partner can be the most interesting, stimulating, delightful companion in the world, provided there's good, open, free communication. A narrow-minded or uninterested companion is anathema to Gemini. The more interested and interesting you are, the happier your Gemini partner will be. Discussing the latest play or novel is vastly preferable to discussing the shortcomings of your bank manager, or whether or not the electricity bill has been paid.

Geminis usually have a high code of ethics in relationship. Although they dislike being probed, most of the time they'll be honest about their answer - especially if you haven't asked the question. But they will take the path of deviousness when they feel there isn't any other way, and they're most likely to feel like that if you subject them to a constant barrage of emotional demands. Emotional "double messages" and manipulative tactics bewilder and infuriate them.

Although Gemini can be incredibly adroit on the intellectual level, their reliance on logic makes it hard for them to understand ambiguity and ambivalence of feeling, and the time-honoured tactic of the "pregnant silence" just makes them feel threatened and resentful.

Some Geminis will always remain childlike, in the best and worst sense of the word. Gilded and charming, delightful yet insubstantial, they dip their toes into the waters of love and vanish abruptly if the water gets too warm. If you get involved with this more extreme type of Gemini, have fun, but don't start planning the future.

Even an introspective Gemini needs lots of breathing space. Commitment can take a long time, because Geminis need to know that the trap isn't going to snap shut on them. If you're a strongly emotional type, make very sure that you've got a life of your own, so that you don't expect your Gemini partner to fulfil all your emotional needs. And if you've found one of those Geminis with some real self- understanding, then you're lucky indeed.

Although Gemini will always be elusive, challenging, and reluctant to engage in dramatic emotional scenes, he'll meet you halfway. Then Gemini can wave that magic wand, take flight with you, and show you those distant mountain heights where the air is clear.

The Gemini man

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